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  • John Reeves

What's In A Word



The main aim of this website is to get people talking.


I have found that a large number of our population choose to skirt around any mention or discussion on the subject of death and dying. Death is the one thing that we can all be certain of, yet for many it is a subject to shy away from.


We will all, at one time or another, be faced with death. We will experience the death of family members, friends, colleagues and, at some point, our own death, yet often, when talking about it, we dress it up in euphemisms not wanting to utter the dreaded words. Somebody once said that "talking about sex doesn't make you pregnant, neither does talking about death make you die". Isn't it time to start breaking down the taboos and to start talking honestly and openly about death. It's actually healthy to talk about death.


In the first of these Elephant In The Room blogs I want us to look at the many euphemisms we use when faced with having to acknowledge the death of someone.


On a recent visit to Highgate Cemetery in London (it's what my wife and I do, by the way. We love to visit cemeteries), amongst all the ornate memorials with their grand inscriptions we spotted the one pictured above. It's the grave of the artist Patrick Caulfield. I was struck by the honesty of this particular gravestone which simply bears the word "DEAD" which has been laser cut into the stone.


When I die I don't want people to say that I've "passed on" or "fallen asleep", I don't want them to say that I've "lost my fight" against whatever might have ailed me in life. I don't want people to say they have "lost" me. I want my family and friends to say, quite honestly that I have died, that I am dead.


For young children particularly, it can be a cause of worry if we tell them that "Granny has fallen asleep" and they never get to see them again. I wonder how many children have been afraid to go to bed at night in case they fall asleep and never wake up.


The more that we can talk about death and dying, the less fear there will be. When things are hidden or not spoken about they become shrouded in fear.


Lets talk. If you have any thoughts or comments please let us know. You can either click on the "Contact Us" button at the top of the page or send an email to info@theelephantintheroom.online


Some common euphemisms for death -

Kicked The Bucket

Passed Away

Passed On

Pop one’s clogs

Pushing up daisies

Croaked

Six feet under

Joined the choir triumphant

Gone Home

Promoted to Glory

Shuffled off this mortal coil

Lost

Gone to meet their maker

Checked out

A goner

Bit the dust

Gave up the ghost

Gone to the other side

Carried away by the angels

Lost the race

Crossed over

Fallen asleep

Departed

Out of their misery

Sailed of into the sunset


There are many more. Some are related to religious belief, some are humorous, some are simply an avoidance. But whatever words we use, the meaning is the same.


Jim Fox

 


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